Critic’s Rating : 1.5 Star.

Cast: Arshad Warsi, JackkyBhagnani, Lauren Gottlieb.

Direction: Ashish R Mohan.

Producer: Vashu Bhagnani.

Written: Vrajesh Hirjee.

Genre: Adventure.

Duration: 132 Minutes.

Welcome 2 Karachi rolls with opening pop-up credits and character introductions that try being funny instead of making any real headway on that front. Kedar Patel (Jackky Bhagnani) and court-martialled captain Shammi Thakur (Arshad Warsi) are good friends. Our Gujarati chokro is not the brightest bulb around.

After bungling his opportunities to get a visa for America, he conspires with Shammi to go there by boat.There’s alcohol and a bevy of beautiful women gyrating in their skimpiest for the men. As is obvious, it is not smooth sailing. The special effects try their best to convince you of a storm and choppy waters. For some reason, the firangs decide to take their chances in a rowboat rather than the sturdier private yacht. This was to merely cast off the extras as castaways from the plot but why have them and that unnecessary item song in the first place?
The men get awash on the shores of Karachi, unconscious to the point where even a bomb blast on the beach does not wake them up. Cue the film’s title, an appearance that looks abrupt when you could have sworn that you were done with opening credits a long time ago.
They wake up in the hospital, realise their predicament and want out. However, Kedar’s father (Dalip Tahil) does not believe their plight (were there no deductions for receiving an international call on his phone, especially from a foreign landline number?). The Indian Consulate is closed that day too, but the others do too because the duo trigger an all-out war among them with some inadvertent firing. In a blatant, politically-aware statement of sorts, Iraq and USA, Israel and Palestine, Ukraine and Russia exchange bullets while China and Nepal add to the noise.

They are pursued by Intelligence Officer Shazia Ansari (Lauren Gottlieb), who is just a token hottie they needed to shrug off her high-collar look for a low-cut outfit in a dream song sequence. She wants to keep the presence of the two Indian men on Pakistani soil on the down-low which is a stupid proposition given the aforementioned shoot-out. Somehow, that incident is never revisited in the film.

 

As we realise soon enough, being smart was never on the makers’ radar. The two blokes blunder from government agents to the Taliban where they receive gruelling training. Why ex-naval officer Shammi fares so badly when it comes to shooting remains a mystery. Kedar is established to be a complete moron. But Shammi is inconsistently written, being asinine one instant and street-smart the next. For someone in the armed forces, he cannot even recognise a picture of Barack Obama when it is shown to him.

There are instances of good timing in dialogue like when a bearded old man is appalled by Kedar’s inability to read Urdu and brands him a “Coke Studio ki padaish.” Another scene where Kedar and Shammi hijack a car, they are told by the mysterious passenger in the backseat: “Mere paas harr sarhad ki chaabi hai.” “Taalewaala hoga,” says Shammi after exchanging a glance with Kedar.

While you cannot nitpick on logic in a film that does not purport to have any, it must be said that Welcome 2 Karachi had a good concept on paper. That is where the idea languished. Onscreen, the gags are juvenile and a lot of the humour is a series of misfires.

 

Kedar and Shammiare supposed to play off each other like a foil and counterfoil. It does not come across either in characterisation or in performances. Arshad Warsi makes the best of an absurd part, succeeding in spurts. Jackky Bhagnani manages to hold on to a Gujarati accent more consistently than some bigger movie stars have during their vernacular turns. It is not a stellar performance but he shows potential, perhaps under better direction.

For a film on a young man eager to get to America, watch Tere Bin Laden. For a bumbling simpleton who accidently crosses the border from India to Pakistan, check out Filmistaan. Welcome 2 Karachi may combine both storylines but does not have half the impact.